writing facade

i only write poetry
when i'm depressed
the kind where
i'm at the bottom of some hole
i'm filling it
with words
painted in feelings

in poems
when my heart is breaking
they are the painful screams
of my heart
that travel to my brain
then burst into fragments of poetry

when i'm in love
poems escape my lips
to my lover
i don't need to write it down

out of love
i document my grief
because i don't think
anyone really wants to know
what a sad girl
i've become